Parenting My Kids So They Think On Their Own – It Takes Patience!

DoodleMom

7 years ago

parenting I was so pleased to have the opportunity to review Taming the Lecture Bug and Getting Your Kids to Think (book & video) from Parenting Made Practical because I have twin teenagers and I have found myself infected with that dreaded lecture bug!

What Is It? – “Taming the Lecture Bug and Getting Your Kids to Think” is available as a book and a unique companion DVD.

The book takes you through twelve short chapters that describe the problem: children who don’t listen to you and who haven’t figured out how to plan and execute for themselves.

The authors, Joey and Carla Link use examples from their own experiences to show that in fact the biggest problem is not the child, but the way you as the parent are responding and reacting to your children.

This book is written in a conversational style and is a in-your-face no-holds-barred, straight-forward conversation.

The key to so many problems you have with your kids is actually you and your lecturing. How do you fix it?

Well, that would be telling! You have to read the book to find out.

But as hard as it was for me to find the patience to back away and let my kids fail or succeed on their own, it was exactly what I needed to do in order to help them.

The video is a great mini-introduction to the book.

Taming the Lecture Bug and Getting Your Kids to Think DVD video is a fantastic addition to the physical book. It is well-worth taking the time to listen to Carla Link’s testimonial and explanation for how she and Joey came to discover a way to conquer the lecture bug and help their children to think for themselves.

In addition, the Link children participate as part of some of the role playing exercises that Joey Link demonstrates in this Parent’s Night Out video. Even if you read the book, watching a parent work through a problem with his daughter in a video is a fantastic way to understand how to put the principles into practice.

If you are a homeschooling family, you may find that there is a lot of mention in the video of school and schoolteachers, but if you keep an open mind and stick with it to the end of the video there are plenty of useful lessons you can take away from the experience.

Will It Enhance Your Homeschool?

The results for us have been tremendous. My kids (and I) made it through the process pretty well over the period of about a month and now things are so, so much better for all of us. No more lectures and reminding. Well, most of the time. (Sometimes I still slip up.)

This is a fantastic book, I would recommend it to everyone with kids!

You will find that if you put the principles to practice in the book and the video, your homeschool will be transformed. Your children will settle into a new-found sense of responsibility and confidence. And you will have so much extra time to enjoy them, because you won’t be running about lecturing them! (At least that is how it worked in our family.)

Time Required To Teach This, if you decide to work through the material with your child

Preparation Time: a few hours to read the book and watch the video.

Teaching Time: four to six weeks of putting the ideas into practice and you will see definite results.

How We Used It

I watched the video and my husband and I discussed the book as I read it on a Sunday morning, before the kids woke. Then my husband and I decided how we should both put the ideas into practice. Planning our parenting strategy was the easy part.

The hard part started when my son got up late that Sunday morning and told me he needed a ride that afternoon to do some work as part of his position in the his scout troop. We have talked again and again about how important it is to think ahead. I held firm. Then I told him that he knew that I needed to know ahead of time and that this particular afternoon I had scheduled work that needed to get done. Finally I referred him to his father, who asked him if he had made arrangements with the adult he needed to work with yet.

Well, the answer was no. You can probably see where this is going. Together my husband and I stopped reminding our son of things he needed to do and places he needed to be. The results were some heartbreaking moments when I had to walk out of the room so I wouldn’t get in and remind my son. There were times that he forgot important things and ended up letting people down and missing schedules. But after a couple failures, he pulled himself together, and took ownership for his own responsibilities and activities.

Wow – as hard as it was, I tamed the lecture bug, and my boy started to think on his own!

Did We Like It?

This is a fantastic product. I think every parent could benefit from the approach, hints, tips, and encouragement that are packed into every corner of this book! Some aspects of the suggestions in the book do not work for us as a family, mostly because I have children who had hard experiences growing up and need all the love and gentleness I can give right now. But regardless, the material was easy to adapt to our situation and worked so very well! It may well be the most important book on parenting I have read, ever!